[Reportage] Divided Korean families bid each other goodbye on final day of reunion

Posted on : 2018-08-23 17:04 KST Modified on : 2019-10-19 20:29 KST
Event concludes in stream of endless tears and wails
South Korean Han Shin-ja
South Korean Han Shin-ja

South Koreans break down into tears as they prepare to leave behind family members in North Korea after the conclusion of their reunion on Aug. 22. (photo pool)
South Koreans break down into tears as they prepare to leave behind family members in North Korea after the conclusion of their reunion on Aug. 22. (photo pool)
South Korean Cho Hye-do
South Korean Cho Hye-do

“The bus I’m going to be riding is No. 8, No. 8, No. 8,” said 92-year-old Shin Jae-cheon. He kept repeating the bus number to his North Korean younger sister Geum-son, 70, who Jae-cheon said “looks just like Mom.”

As the only member of his family who had fled to South Korea, Shin had been lonely his entire life. He had missed his little sister Geum-son so much that he had called her name every night he spent alone – “Be strong, Geum-son!”

Jae-cheon said that meeting his little sister had brought him “joy and relief from the heartache,” and now they were being separated again.

“If the border is opened up, I’d like to take you home and put some flesh on those bones [. . .] While you’re still alive, you need to come over and have a meal with me. If I drive my car, it’s just 40 minutes [from Gimpo, South Korea, to Kaesong, North Korea]. If the border is opened up, I’ll let you eat your fill [. . .]”

Even though Jae-cheon had seen his little sister dining well for their three days together, he still wished he could do something else for her.

The entire time that South Korean Han Shin-ja, 88, was reunited with her two North Korean daughters, she was busy giving instructions.

“Sticky rice has a lot of nutrients, so you need to eat a lot of that,” Shin ja said.

“Okay, Mom.”

“You’ve got to stay healthy and live a long time. That’s my wish.”

North Koreans bid their farewells to South Korean family members on their return bus. (photo pool)
North Koreans bid their farewells to South Korean family members on their return bus. (photo pool)

Aug. 22 marked the end of the first round of the 21st reunion for families divided by the Korean War, which was held for three days at Mt. Kumgang in North Korea. From 10 am to 1 pm on Aug. 22, the families said their goodbyes at Mt. Kumgang Hotel.

“Goodbye and see you soon!”

“Take care and see you soon!”

“With a lump in my throat, I cry."

“Be well and see you soon!”

At 1 pm, the song “See You Soon” – a song familiar to both South and North Koreans -- came on the loudspeakers at the banquet hall on the second floor of the Mt. Kumgang Hotel, and the emcee announced that the three hours were up and that the reunions were over. The dreaded moment had finally arrived.

The question hovering in the air was whether the more than 56,000 divided family members separated in South and North Korea would ever be reunited, and whether the 89 Korean families who had met during the first round of the 21st reunion would ever see each other again.

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86

Silence followed by tears

Han Shin-ja’s oldest daughter had been quiet and reserved throughout the three days of the reunion, but when her mother boarded the bus, she beat on it with the palm of her hands. The window of the bus was taller than the daughter, so she could barely see her mother’s face. She wailed and shrieked until her voice cracked. “Mom! Take care of yourself!” Han and her daughters Kim Gyeong-sil, 72, and Kim Gyeong-yong, 71, sobbed and moaned, separated by the window of the bus.

North Korean Park Chun-hwa, 58, niece of South Korean Choi Dong-gyu, 84, stamped her feet next to the bus. “Do we really have to be separated like this? This is so ridiculous! If the country was unified, this wouldn’t happen. It’s just so stupid!”

North Koreans wave goodbye to their family members as they prepare to head back to South Korea. (photo pool)
North Koreans wave goodbye to their family members as they prepare to head back to South Korea. (photo pool)

South Korean Koh Ho-jun, 77, finally had to get off the bus, unable to keep watching his North Korean niece and her mother, the wife of his older brother, crying outside. “Goodness, my niece, how am I supposed to leave? I really wish we didn’t have to be separated,” Koh said, weeping as he hugged his niece.

“Don’t cry, Uncle!” the niece said, even as tears streaming down her face. “Stay healthy so I can see you again after unification.”

North Korean Ri Gwang-pil, 61, the North Korean nephew of Lee Gwan-ju, 93, was bawling like a baby outside of Bus No. 5, which his uncle was on. Gwang-pil held up his hand for his uncle to see – with a pen, he had written the message “Live a long life!” on his hand. Gwan-ju put on some sunglasses to conceal his puffy eyes. And that was how the buses bound for Sokcho, South Korea, departed Mt. Kumgang, carrying 197 South Koreans from 89 families.

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88

Trading phone numbers and pocketing a sketch of a family tree

During their final meeting together, nearly all of the families exchanged their addresses and phone numbers. They were trying to create a connection so that someday, when it becomes possible to travel freely between South and North Korea, they could call each other and arrange a visit. Even if that doesn’t happen in their lifetime, they hope it may be possible for their children.

Quite a few families were drawing family trees and writing down the names of their relatives. South Korean Dokgo Ran, 91, and his son Seok, 55, drew a family tree with their cousins from North Korea. Seok plans to use this family tree to find his relatives in North Korea in the event that his aged father passes away before that becomes possible.

“Can you write down the names of your children?” South Korean Lee Su-nam, 77, asked his North Korean nephew Ri Myong-hun, 50. Myong-hun wrote down a dozen or so names – siblings and grandchildren – and then handed the list to his uncle. “I’d like to remember them while I’m alive,” Su-nam said.

“It’s hard to put into words,” Su-nam said when reporters asked what it felt like to meet his older brother and nephew at the reunion.

 talks with her older sister Cho Sun-do
talks with her older sister Cho Sun-do

After a moment’s thought, he said, “I’m worried that I won’t be able to see them again. It wouldn’t be a problem if I were younger. It would be great if we could just stay in touch with each other.”

“I’m going to visit my parents’ grave [in South Korea] and tell them I’ve confirmed that my older brother Jong-song is alive and well,” Su-nam said.

As the time to say goodbye approached, emotions welled up. This was family members’ final chance to spend time together, and many of them still hadn’t seen enough of each other. As soon as South Korean Kim Byeong-o, 88, saw his North Korean younger sister enter the meeting area and sit down at the table, he gazed up into empty space. He sobbed audibly, disregarding the sister sitting beside him.

 who lives in North Korea. (photo pool)
who lives in North Korea. (photo pool)

“Don’t cry, brother, please don’t cry,” the sister said, holding her older brother’s hand, but he didn’t stop. Before long, his sister’s eyes were turning red and her lips were trembling, too. For more than ten minutes, the siblings were unable to say a thing. Heavy sighs filled the air around the table.

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89

Tears were pouring from the eyes of South Korean Kim Chun-sik, 80, as he sat next to his sisters Chun-sil, 77, and Chun-nyo, 71. During the Korean War, Chun-sik had left his sisters behind when he went south, and once again, he had to go south alone. Watching him, his sisters buried their faces in their handkerchiefs. Nearly speechless with regret, Chun-sik at last managed to say, “You have to stay alive so we can meet again.”

By Noh Ji-won, staff reporter

Please direct comments or questions to [english@hani.co.kr]

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