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A poster for an exhibition for the book “How Are All of You Getting By?” will be held from Mar. 29 to Apr. 3 at the second exhibition hall of Gallery 1898 under Seoul’s Myeongdong Cathedral

An exhibition for the book “How Are All of You Getting By?” will be held from Mar. 29 to Apr. 3 at the second exhibition hall of Gallery 1898 under Seoul’s Myeongdong Cathedral. The works on display will combine excerpts from the book with images by illustrator Ko Yul.

“It’s been six years since we said goodbye to my son, but for us family members who were left behind, it’s like time has stopped. Even now, I go into a daze whenever someone talks about their son or I’m walking along and see someone who looks similar.”

South Korean suicide rate

The father, a man in his late fifties surnamed Jeong, lost his son six years ago. Jeong’s son had been approaching graduation after returning to school from military service when he took his own life, leaving behind a one-page suicide note. Since the sudden death of his son, Jeong has depended on alcohol to get through the days. Was it his parents’ fault for forcing their dreams of elite university admission on their son? He felt like taking a time machine to return to the days that kept flickering through his head.

“As a father, losing your son is a brutal punishment. It makes your legs weak when you try to walk, and it leaves you incapable of any desires or goals,” he said.

Jeong’s story was one of several in “How Are All of You Getting By?,” a collection of writings by people who lost loved ones to suicide published on Mar. 28 by the Ministry of Health and Welfare and the Korea Suicide Prevention Center.

The book contains 29 writings selected from open submissions by people who lost loved ones to suicide last year. In addition to the experiences of parents like Jeong who lost their children, it captures the entire process of pain and recovery for husbands and wives, friends and lovers.

South Korea’s suicide rate stood at 26.5 for 100,000 people in 2015, ranking it the highest among OECD member countries. For each suicide that occurs, five to ten family members and other acquaintances are also affected, the Ministry of Health and Welfare said. Extrapolating from that figure gives a total of 700,000 people in South Korea who have lost loved ones to suicide in the last 10 years.

“In addition to the grief of suddenly losing someone close to them, family members experience a complex mixture of difficulties with guilt, anger, societal prejudice, and an increased sense of burden with their role,” said Cha Jeon-gyeong, head of the ministry’s mental health policy division.

“[Family members of people who commit suicide] are reported to be at seven times greater risk of depression than the general population, and at 8.3 times greater risk of suicide,” Cha said.

A 2015 study by the ministry-affiliated Korea Psychological Autopsy Center showed 31.8% of South Koreans to have experienced the suicide of a close family member, relative, or friend. Those in this group were also found to have contemplated suicide themselves at a higher rate than those outside.

The ministry and experts recommend participating in self-help meetings with people sharing similar issues as a way of helping survivors get through their suffering. A total of 241 psychological health promotion centers across South Korea currently offer psychological counseling and self-help meetings for family members of people who have committed suicide.

By Hwangbo Yon, staff reporter

Please direct questions or comments to [english@hani.co.kr]