hankyoreh

A joint sacrament organized by the Anglican Church of Korea’s Justice and Peace Priests’ Association and another Anglican organization is held in front of the joint memorial altar for victims of the Oct. 29 crowd crush in Itaewon, Seoul, for Christmas. (Kim Hye-yun/The Hankyoreh)

The Hankyoreh is publishing a letter of consolation and solidarity to those who survived the tragic crowd crush in Itaewon on Oct. 29. The Hankyoreh and the 10.29 Itaewon Disaster Citizens’ Action Group also plan on arranging an opportunity for victims' families, survivors, witnesses and rescuers to gather and talk about the Itaewon tragedy, and the various issues that have ensued.

==============

How have you been?

It feels wrong for me to greet you with a “Hello!” or a “Have you been well?” so I have no choice but to offer a timid address.

I wonder if you are healthy, if you are eating at all, if you don’t feel lonely amidst the sparkling Christmas decorations and everyone who seems to be reveling in the end-of-year festivities. I worry that you are trying to act like everything is fine, and that that is making you feel guilty.

That day in Itaewon, the government’s response, and the never-ending verbal assaults aimed at everyone involved all so resembled the course of events of the Sewol ferry disaster that my heart ached while watching.

I had vowed to help build a safe, secure society so that no one else would have to go through what we went through. Seeing so many people get hurt and lose their lives made it hard for me to write this letter, as guilt filled my heart and weighed down on my chest.

I’m so sorry. It must’ve been so terrible, made all the more difficult since you didn’t have anyone you could trust or confide in, and because no one cared to listen. You probably couldn’t talk about it, not because you lacked the courage to, but because you thought that no one, not even our society at large, would listen to you.

I hope that you know now and never forget the fact that this was not your fault. It’s not your fault that you visited Itaewon that day, got injured, but didn’t die. No one deserves to go through anything like you did.

In the wake of the Sewol ferry tragedy, I monitored online hate speech on the sinking. I became afraid of people, even strangers passing on the street. As soon as I heard the “Se” in “Sewol,” my body grew stiff, and I had to plug my ears with earbuds whenever I went outside.

But there was a whole world that I was unable to see when I focused only on the hateful comments on my phone screen. Seeing, in person, that many were grieving and hurting gave me a lot of solace. Being able to meet others who had lost family members in the tragedy and meeting the fellow siblings of the victims, who knew the pain of barely struggling through each day, helped me get through everything. There’s no greater comfort than having someone who knows what you’re feeling with a single glance.

Meeting victims of domestic and international tragedies made me aware of the academic term “victim blaming.” The phenomenon is so common that they made a word for it. Even victims of the Holocaust were criticized and made to feel guilty. Learning about the concept also made me realize that speaking up should not be dismissed as “whining” by victims, but should be recognized as what it is: the lawful right of victims.

I also learned that there are myriad rights afforded to victims of these sorts of disasters — the right to be informed of the disaster one is in, the right to be rescued, the right to demand punishment for those responsible, the right to receive a proper apology, and the right to be embedded in social memory.

Learning all this made me promise myself that I would not hide in the shadows like a criminal while the perpetrators strutted around for all the world to see.

I cannot fathom how you’re feeling. But I will try to understand and try to sympathize. I will respect your pain and you, for what they are. You are not alone.

Thank you for getting through today, and for surviving.

Park Bo-na (Hankyoreh file photo)

Sincerely,

Park Bo-na, older sister of Park Sung-ho (Danwon High School sophomore, Class 5), victim of the Sewol ferry tragedy

Dec. 25, 2022

Please direct questions or comments to [english@hani.co.kr]